Conversatio Divina

Part 10 of 19

Shaping A Rule Of Life

Chris Webb

01.  I’ve Got Rhythm

The Irish summer sun was still just a pale rumor on the horizon when I began hearing activity in the house below us. We were on holiday visiting my wife’s sister and family, and the first morning I began learning what it meant for my brother-in-law to work as a baker. Every day the rhythm of the morning was the same: baking scones as the sun rose; deliveries in the battered white van; then out to the store to begin baking a more substantial quantity of bread and cakes. Afternoons were filled with construction work since he was building a house for his family beside the bakery. In the evenings, we were often joined by other members of the small Amish community to which they belong. Each day the rhythm ticked along with the precision of clockwork. 

I returned home from this visit with a fiercely aggressive virus that laid me flat for a week. My own usual rhythms of life were suddenly disrupted. Usually an early riser, I found it impossible to wake up in the mornings. Mealtimes were messed up as my appetite swung between extremes of nausea and terrific hunger. I had to step back from my pastoral ministry for a few days and spend more time reading and resting. 

Surprisingly, the broken rhythms took almost as much of a toll as the illness itself. After a week I found myself disoriented and lethargic, having to remind myself what day of the week or time of day it was. The experience reinforced in me one of my core beliefs: we are profoundly creatures of habit. Even though our culture places great value on spontaneity and impulse, we mostly live according to very predictable routines and patterns; we like to travel our own well-worn paths. These habits provide us with the structure and stability we need in order to be spontaneous and impulsive without becoming chaotic and unbalanced. We’ve all got rhythm. 

02.  Rhythm and Intentionality

Becoming more intentional in shaping our lives as apprentices of Jesus means not only learning the classical practices of discipleship—disciplines such as prayer, fasting, and service—but also paying serious attention to the overall rhythm of our lives. The experience of a myriad of Christians across the last 20 centuries has shown that even the simplest spiritual disciplines, when integrated into an intentional pattern of daily living, can have an unexpectedly powerful, transformative effect as they expose us with irresistible regularity to the ever-present grace of God. 

We sometimes call these intentional rhythms of living a “rule of life,” a phrase that’s very easily misunderstood. From the Latin phrase, regula vitae, it has little to do with regulations and laws. The Latin word, regula, was used to describe a wooden stick used for making measurements and checking the straightness of a line, a tool for building straight and true. We’ve been doing work on our house since we’ve moved back home to Wales, so I’ve often been reaching into my toolbox for a folding carpenter’s regula to make measurements for shelving, furniture, and picture hanging. Although it’s very prescriptive—the little marks along the rule aren’t prepared to have a discussion about how many inches high my doorframes are—I’ve not experienced it as a tyrant. The opposite, in fact, is true; it’s liberated me to do a good job. 

And that’s exactly the purpose of a regula vitae, a rule of life. It’s a tool designed to liberate us to live the Jesus way well, to live straight and true. By setting out a pattern of life that consistently draws us back into the presence of God, a rule enables us to develop the easy rhythms of grace that make lifelong discipleship possible. Many manuscripts of one of the earliest regulae vitae, the Rule of St. Benedict, reflect this understanding in an opening superscription: “This is called a regula because it keeps straight [dirigat] the lives of those who obey it.”RB 1980: The Rule of St Benedict in Latin and English with Notes, Timothy Fry, OSB, ed.. (Collegeville, MN: Liturgical Press, 1981), 168 (superscript to the first chapter of the Rule, author’s translation of the Latin).A rule of life is a gift, not a burden. 

03.  A Look in the Mirror

Someone entering a traditional religious community, such as a monastery or friary, is presented from the very beginning with the rule of life of that community. Looking again at the Rule of St. Benedict, we find that when novices are first received, the Rule is read to them three times over the course of a year with the admonition: “This is the law under which you are choosing to serve. If you can observe it, enter; if you cannot, you are free to depart.”The Rule of St Benedict, 266 (58:10, author’s translation of the Latin). These community rules aren’t negotiable; it’s very much “take it or leave it.” A novice’s rule of life is derived from the wider community rhythm. It’s a package deal. 

But what about the rest of us? Is it possible for us to develop individual rules of life, rhythms of living, which will strengthen our intentional following of Christ? Very much so. And the six streams of Christianity provide a terrific model for doing so. But before we can begin establishing new patterns of life, we would be wise to understand the rhythms we already have. So I’d like to propose a simple exercise, which will help reveal the patterns and rhythms we’re currently embracing. 

04.  The Rhythm of Today

Take a sheet of paper and draw lines to divide it into four columns. At the head of these columns write the following words: Daily, Weekly, Monthly, and Occasionally. In each of these columns, start writing down all the things you do with any regularity. And I do mean all the things you do, not just the spiritual things. So, for example, in the Daily column write down anything you do every day, or almost every day. That might include daily Bible reading as well as eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Write down brushing teeth, and watching TV (if you do that most days) and commuting to work. It takes a while, and the length of the list you develop may surprise you. 

As the Daily column grows, start filling in the Weekly and Monthly columns. What do you do every week. Go to church? A date with your spouse? Run the scout troop? Watch a movie? Clean the car? Write it all down. Your monthly trip to the used bookstore or fishing with your neighbor or working on the soup kitchen—it all needs to be included. Finally, work toward the Occasionally column. Here you write anything you do regularly, but less often than once a month. This might be your annual retreat or vacation, or that trip to see relatives every three months. It doesn’t matter how important or trivial it is; if it happens with any regularity, any predictability, write it down. 

Done that? Great. Now step back. You’re looking at a regula vitae, a rhythm of life. Your rhythm of life, to be precise. It might seem like a mishmash of good and bad, of the important and the trivial. For many of us, our present regula vitae will be a combination of good and bad habits, diligence and laziness, intentionality and inertia, and the flotsam and jetsam of a few decades of ordinary life. But it’s important to be able to step back like this and take stock, to tell the truth about ourselves. As David says to God in the Psalms, “you desire truth in our inward self” (Psalm 51:6, author’s paraphrase). Knowing the truth about our lives is the first step towards genuine and lasting change. 

05.  Intentional Rhythms

As you look at your current life rhythms, you might find yourself thinking that there’s plenty of scope for integrating your desire to follow Christ more fully into your daily, weekly, and monthly routines. But how might we do that and do it well? Let me suggest a second exercise that can help us discover practical, manageable, realistic ways of expressing our love for Jesus more fully in our day-to-day lives. 

Take a second sheet of paper and write six headings along the top: Contemplative; Holiness; Charismatic; Social Justice; Evangelical; and Incarnational. These are, of course, the six streams of Christ-like life described by Richard Foster in Streams of Living Water. These six streams are intended to provide a rounded description of the character of Jesus, and therefore the character we desire to see formed in us by the grace of the Holy Spirit. And part of that formation is intentionally expressing each of these streams in our everyday lives, seeking to engage with the life of Christ in our own lives. 

In this second exercise I invite you to spend a little time reflecting on your life in the context of each of these six streams, asking how each stream is currently expressed and made incarnate in the activities of your day—and how each could become more fully manifest in you. Under each heading we’re going to seek one or two concrete commitments we can write down. What are your practical expressions of your desire to be an apprentice of Jesus? 

The commitments we’re looking to articulate might either be descriptions of something you already do, or aspirations expressing something you could be doing and would like to be doing. But here we need to be very careful not to stray into the realms of heroic fantasy. We all have family and work commitments that constrain us. We have physical limitations; there is a certain minimum amount of rest and sleep we need to remain healthy. There is a sharp line between what is possible in our fantasies (almost anything) and what is possible in reality (sometimes very limited). 

So in this exercise, keep in mind three simple guidelines for drafting the commitments that form our regula vitae: 

  1. Keep it real. A commitment to pray for fifteen minutes daily might not sound much, but you’ll probably keep it. A vow to spend three hours a day in prayer is heroic, but for most of us also ridiculous. 
  2. Keep it simple. Grow slowly. Practice moderation and aim for small, manageable steps forward. Don’t take on too much. 
  3. Keep it short. One or two commitments under each of the six headings is plenty.  
  4. You should be able to memorize your rule or write it on one side of an index card. More than that is almost always too much. 

With those guidelines firmly before us, let’s reflect on each of the streams. 

06.  Contemplative

How do I intend to be open to the presence of God in prayer, meditation, and spiritual reading? It helps to be very specific here. How much time will you set aside each day for some contemplative practice? What time of day will that usually happen? Where will you pray or read? What form will your practice take—silent prayer, the daily office, a quiet time, lectio divina, centering prayer, or some other? Which practices do you currently engage with and which have you found most helpful in recent years?

07.  Holiness

How do I intend to open myself to God leading me into deeper holiness of heart and life? Some of the important disciplines we might seek to embrace in this area include the practices of self-denial (fasting, submission, solitude, silence) and those practices that foster our love of others (service, encouragement, giving). We might also consider the place of confession in our discipleship—whether that means prayerful confession to God or open confession to another Christian.

08.  Charismatic

How do I intend to open myself to the work of the Spirit in my life? We need to remember, of course, that the Spirit blows where the Spirit wills; we cannot control the gifts we are given, and our rule of life needs to acknowledge that. So while it doesn’t make much sense to write, “I will offer a word of wisdom every day,” we might well write, “I will pray for a word of wisdom whenever it seems appropriate.”

09.  Social Justice

How do I intend to serve God in others, working for justice and peace in all relationships? There are a myriad of ways we can express this stream in our daily lives: volunteering with a non-profit or our church; visiting shut-ins; attending a political demonstration; offering counseling services; joining a political party; giving time to a neighborhood organization—and so much more. And it’s an important stream that we need to reflect on carefully; it is often this stream that does the most to ensure our personal rule of life doesn’t become a private rule. It helps carry our intentional discipleship out into the public world.

10.  Evangelical

How do I intend to experience the word of God in Scripture, and share that word with others? As we approach Scripture, it’s important for us to pay particular attention to the quality of our reading, rather than the quantity. Although a rule of life will probably contain a concrete commitment to a certain amount of reading, such as a length of time given to lectio divina or a number of verses or chapters to be read daily, we should always remember that reading the Bible is not an Olympic event, and there are no prizes for sprinters over against the long distance runners.

11.  Incarnational

How do I intend to seek and respond to the grace of God around me in the common matters of everyday life and work? This final stream takes seriously the sacramental nature of our lives. Although some Christians and traditions have had problems with the word “sacrament,” it’s a tremendously helpful concept for expressing incarnational living: an outward and visible sign of an inward and invisible grace. That can, of course, apply to bread and wine or outpoured water during a church service. But a family meal, a meeting with colleagues at work, the digging of a road, or the planting of a garden can equally become a visible sign of invisible grace.

 

12.  A Personal Rule of Life

What might a finished rule of life look like? Some years ago, when I first undertook this exercise, the result looked something like this: 

  • Contemplative: Pray the offices of Morning and Evening Prayer daily and make a retreat once every year. 
  • Holiness: Fast until evening one day each week and practice an examination of conscience weekly. 
  • Charismatic: Worship together with the Church each Sunday and engage in a ministry of spiritual direction. 
  • Social Justice: Practice simplicity by giving generously and traveling light, and practice hospitality in my home whenever possible. 
  • Evangelical: Read a passage of Scripture daily and study a Christian book every month. 
  • Incarnational: Receive the Eucharist every Sunday and seek the presence of God in my daily work. 

 

I can guess what you might be thinking: It’s not exactly Earth-shattering stuff, is it? Of course, such a simple set of commitments is not about the change the world. But 15 years later, I can testify that this little rule has helped transform my life. Think of each of these commitments as a drop of water—in itself insignificant, almost trivial. Would the world end if I didn’t pray Morning Prayer today? Clearly not. Would the world be forever changed if I pray tomorrow? I’m sure it wouldn’t. Each act is just a drop of water. 

But over the years, those drops of water have fallen like a steady rain on the landscape of my soul, watering barren land and bringing growth, reshaping the rocks and hard places, flowing together into streams and rivers that have cut channels through my heart. They have formed me in prayer, in service, in immersion in God’s word, in my relationships, in my daily work. They have opened me again and again to the grace of God. They have shaped me. 

How about you? Are you willing to give this a try? Then I have one more exercise to suggest. Using the process described in this article, draw up a simple regula vitae, a rule of life. It may help to discuss it with a trusted friend or two. Then put it into practice. Live by it for a few months. Don’t be legalistic; it won’t work every day. But commit yourself to it as fully as you can. Let it shape you a little. Feel yourself settling into the new rhythms of grace. 

And after maybe six months, come back and compare these new rhythms with your original sheet of paper, the current rhythm of your life. And ask yourself just this one question: If you could go back to your old rhythms of life now, would you want to? 

13.  Further resources on A Rule of Life & St. Benedict

Chittister, Joan. Wisdom Distilled from the Daily: Living the Rule of St. Benedict Today. San Francisco: HarperOne, 1991. 

De Waal, Esther and Kathleen Norris. Seeking God: The Way of St. Benedict, 2nd ed. Collegeville, MN: Liturgical Press. 2001. 

Macchia, Stephen A. and Mark Buchanan. Crafting a Rule of Life: An Invitation to the Well-Ordered Way. Downers Grove. IL: InterVarsity Press, 2012. 

Pennington , M. Basil Listen With Your Heart: Spiritual Living with the Rule of St. Benedict, Voices from the Monastery. Brewster, MT: Paraclete Press, 2007. 

Wilson-Hartgrove, Jonathan. The Rule of Saint Benedict: A Contemporary Paraphrase, Paraclete Essentials. Brewster, MT: Paraclete Press, 2012. 

Footnotes

Christopher S. Webb is a Benedictine Anglican priest, author, speaker and teacher dedicated to helping people experience a richer walk with God by growing in prayer and the spiritual life. He has ministered in a wide variety of contexts: as president of a spiritual formation ministry in the United States, as parish priest in Welsh farming communities and steel-working towns, and even in a church for the homeless. He is the author of The Fire of the Word (InterVarsity Press). He and his family live in Lampeter, Wales, in the heart of rural Cardiganshire.

Part 6 of 19
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Poetry

Luci Shaw
Spring 2013