Change can be hard, especially when we are unprepared for that change. Remember puberty, for example. So much was happening in your body, mind, and emotions. Ideally, loving adults help teens prepare for those changes in advance. Yet, as we hit our twenties and thirties, most of us are left to navigate life fairly unprepared. What do you wish someone had helped you prepare for in the season of life you are currently in? Is there someone you could mentor through a season of life you have already been through?
Thinking about your current season of life, do you feel that you emotionally or spiritually correspond with where you are in your physical life, or is there a disparity between the two? For example, you may be physically in your forties but emotionally or spiritually feel like “winter.” Or you may be in your sixties and feel like it is springtime in your heart. Spend some time journaling about the synchronicity or disparity between your body and your spiritual/emotional self. If you need help in balancing the parts of your whole, consider talking with a spiritual director.
How much have you thought about your own death? It is a season we would do well to prepare for. The logistics of your funeral are one component to consider, but end-of-life choices are vital as well. Have you informed your close family or friends of your wishes in this regard? Have you created legal documents to spell out your requests, such as a will or medical power of attorney? Rob Moll’s book The Art of Dying: Living Fully into the Life to Come may be helpful here. “Five Wishes” on the Aging with Dignity website (http://www.agingwithdignity.org/five-wishes-resources.php) offers ways to think about end-of-life issues in more than just physical terms. What legacy do you want to leave? What do you want your obituary to say?
What scares you the most about growing old? About dying? Journal your thoughts. Consider processing those fears with a trusted friend, spiritual director, or pastor.
Lane referred to seasons of life from Ecclesiastes: birth, death, weeping, laughing, mourning, dancing. Reflect on the community you have had or not had during the various seasons of your life. Where have you been community to others during their seasons of life?
Does your personality style relish lots of community help and involvement, or do you prefer more privacy, especially during hard and difficult seasons of life? What is the line between privacy and withdrawal? Between allowing community support and using people as an audience (think: reality TV shows)? If those two sets of opposites were on a line, where would you put yourself in the continuum?
Psalm 71Scripture quotations are taken from the New Revised Standard Version, Updated Edition, copyright © 1989, 2021 The National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved. has been called a prayer for lifelong protection and help. Spend several days doing a lectio divina-style meditation on it:
1 In you, O Lord, I take refuge;
let me never be put to shame.
2 In your righteousness deliver me and rescue me;
incline your ear to me and save me.
3 Be to me a rock of refuge,
a strong fortress to save me,
for you are my rock and my fortress.
4 Rescue me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked,
from the grasp of the unjust and cruel.
5 For you, O Lord, are my hope,
my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
6 From my birth I have leaned upon you,
my protector since my mother’s womb.
My praise is continually of you.
7 I have been like a portent to many,
but you are my strong refuge.
8 My mouth is filled with your praise
and with your glory all day long.
9 Do not cast me off in the time of old age;
do not forsake me when my strength is spent.
10 For my enemies speak concerning me,
and those who watch for my life consult together.
11 They say, “Pursue and seize that person
whom God has forsaken,
for there is no one to deliver.”
12 O God, do not be far from me;
O my God, make haste to help me!
13 Let my accusers be put to shame and consumed;
let those who seek to hurt me
be covered with scorn and disgrace.
14 But I will hope continually
and will praise you yet more and more.
15 My mouth will tell of your righteous acts,
of your deeds of salvation all day long,
though their number is past my knowledge.
16 I will come praising the mighty deeds of the Lord God;
I will praise your righteousness, yours alone.
17 O God, from my youth you have taught me,
and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds.
18 So even to old age and gray hairs,
O God, do not forsake me,
until I proclaim your might
to all the generations to come.
Your power 19 and your righteousness, O God,
reach the high heavens.
You who have done great things,
O God, who is like you?
20 You who have made me see many troubles and calamities
will revive me again;
from the depths of the earth
you will bring me up again.
21 You will increase my honor
and comfort me once again.
22 I will also praise you with the harp
for your faithfulness, O my God;
I will sing praises to you with the lyre,
O Holy One of Israel.
23 My lips will shout for joy
when I sing praises to you;
my soul also, which you have rescued.
24 All day long my tongue will talk of your righteous help,
for those who tried to do me harm
have been put to shame and disgraced.
Valerie E. Hess is an author, instructor in Spring Arbor University’s Master of Arts in Spiritual Formation and Leadership (MSFL) program, retreat speaker, musician, mother, and pastor’s wife. She does a weekly blog at www.valeriehess.com and has written numerous articles, mostly on the themes of spiritual formation through the spiritual disciplines and church music.