IGNATIAN SPIRITUAL EXERCISES TRAINING (ISET)
2023-BLOCK THREE – SESSION 25
ACCOMPANYING THROUGH THE ELECTION: PART TWO
Annemarie: [00:00:00] Hello, everyone. Good to be with you. Happy Labor Day for those celebrating Labor Day today. I’m sorry we’re making you work on Labor Day. That seems very unfair, but I hope you’ll at least get a little bit of time to relax afterwards and take a bit of a break. Okay. We’re just waiting another [00:01:00] minute or so just to let the last people in. Okay, so some of you will have received your assignments back and the rest of you will be receiving them back in the next couple of days. They are almost all marked. Thank you for all of those.
And if I can say that the standard is very good, very high and we are marking it with doctoral credit possibilities in terms of the link that we have with Richmont. We are marking it very strictly, so if you’ve got a merit or something, be thrilled because it means you’ve done a really great assignment. Just to give you a heads up that we are marking it very strictly.
We are about to settle into our time of prayer now. I invite you to just sit comfortably, to switch your screens [00:02:00] off if you would like to, and just to take a moment to settle into this space and this time.
Become aware of God present with you and with each one of us. Perhaps to just notice how is it that [00:03:00] God is looking at you today.
I invite you to just listen to the words of this poem by R. S. Thomas. It’s called The Kingdom.
It’s a long way off but inside it
There are quite different things going on:
Festivals at which the poor man
Is king and the consumptive is
Healed; mirrors in which the blind look
At themselves and love looks at them
Back; and industry is for mending
The bent bones and the minds fractured
By life. It’s a long way off, but to get
There takes no time and admission
Is free, if you will purge yourself
Of desire, and present yourself with
Your need only and the simple offering
Of your faith, green as a leaf. [00:05:00]
The Kingdom
It’s a long way off but inside it
There are quite different things going on:
Festivals at which the poor man
Is king and the consumptive is
Healed; mirrors in which the blind look
At themselves and love looks at them
Back; and industry is for mending
The bent bones and the minds fractured
By life. It’s a long way off, but to get
There takes no time and admission
Is free, if you will purge yourself
Of desire, and present yourself with
Your need only and the simple offering
Of your faith, green as a leaf.
[00:06:00] [00:07:00] [00:08:00]
Annemarie: Loving God, as we [00:09:00] continue this journey together today, as we seek to explore how to accompany those making the exercises in making the decisions that lead them deeper and deeper into the reality of the Kingdom, we ask that we may be open to receive all that you long to give us.
We make our prayer trusting in your goodness and in your unfailing love. [00:10:00] In the name of Jesus, our Lord. Amen.
Russell: Greetings to everybody. Whatever time of the day it is where you find yourself, it’s good to be with you again. What we want to do today, as you would have seen from the handout that was sent to you, is we want to look at what I’ve called part two of the election, but it’s really focusing on how to accompany someone through the election.
Last week, we looked at the overall understanding of the process of the election in the spiritual exercises, and today we want to look more specifically at how one accompanies a retreatant through an election or a [00:11:00] form of life. So, that’s what we’re going to set out to do. It’s quite a lot of material, but let’s see how we get on.
I’m also going to use a PowerPoint. So, let’s get started straight away. I want to begin by looking at very specifically what the role of the director or accompanier is when it comes to the process of the election.
So, a couple of things there. To gently guide the process. That’s what we are there for, is to gently guide the process.
To make sure, as far as possible, that the person is making the election from a place of spiritual freedom or indifference. And here we go back again, just to remind ourselves of the Principle and Foundation. You can go and look at that in number [00:12:00] 23. We’re going to look at it a little bit later on as well. In that second part of the Principle and Foundation, Ignatius says,
to do this, I must make myself indifferent to all created things in regard to everything which is left to my freedom of will and is not forbidden.
Consequently, on my own part, I ought not to seek health rather than sickness, wealth rather than poverty, honor rather than dishonor, a long life rather than a short one, and so on in all other matters. I ought to desire and elect the thing which is most conducive to the end for which I am created.
So, we see that kind of radical freedom that we already have spoken about, have prayed about—that indifference of the Principle and Foundation. Here we [00:13:00] really see as we enter into the election we’re trying to make sure in as far as possible that that radicalness for which I am created to do God’s will is where the person finds himself in that place of indifference.
We also want to provide suggestions for prayer that are going to help the person to hear what the Lord wants them to hear, and where appropriate, we’re going to try and apply Ignatius’s guidelines for the discernment of spirits. And we’re going to look at that a little bit more just now.
This is quite important that the director is not to influence the person’s election. Most especially in this important time of the election, the director must allow the creator to deal directly with the creature and the creature with their creator and lord. Ignatius gives us some [00:14:00] advice on what we should be doing, and he does that in those annotations at the beginning of the exercises.
I want us to look again at those annotations, numbers 14, 15, and 16, because these explicitly deal with the role of their company or the director, which are always good to remember for the whole process of the spiritual exercises, but most explicitly and importantly, in the election itself. So, let’s read there number 14.
If the one giving the exercises sees that the exercitant is proceeding with consolation and great fervor, he or she should warn the person not to make some promise or vow which is unconsidered or hasty. The more unstable the director sees the exorcism to be, the more earnest should be the forewarning and the caution.
For [00:15:00] though it is altogether right for someone to advise another to enter religious life, which entails the taking of vows of obedience, poverty, and chastity, and although a good work done under a vow is more meritous than one done without it, still one ought to bestow much thought. on the circumstances and character of each person, and on the helps or hindrances they are likely to meet with in carrying out what one wishes to promise.
So there, annotation number 14 is really warning against the one making the exercises, making an unthinking or too hasty election. In other words, Don’t be hasty. Don’t be unconsidered. Make sure that this is unfolding in a way which takes many other things which we’re going to talk about into consideration.
So, the [00:16:00] director or the accompanier is to have this in the back of their mind, that someone may have a great fervor, and that’s okay. But they should not be entering into this in a very hasty manner. We want to make sure that we do this in a way that is methodical but also slow enough for the process to really get to some depth.
Number 15 is another one. You can go back, and you can read these again but also important one that you’ve heard many times—
The one giving the exercises should not urge the one receiving them toward poverty or any other promise more than towards their opposite or to one state or way of life more than to any other.
Outside the exercises, it is lawful and meritous for us to counsel those [00:17:00] who are probably suitable for it to choose continence, virginity, religious life, and all forms of evangelical perfection. But during these Spiritual Exercises, when a person is seeking God’s will, it is more appropriate and far better that the Creator and Lord Himself should communicate Himself to the devout soul, embracing it with love, inciting it to praise of Himself, and disposing of it for which will most enable the soul to serve Him in the future.
Accordingly, the one giving the exercises ought not to lean or incline in either direction, but rather while standing by like the pointer of a scale in equilibrium to allow the creator to deal immediately with the creature and the creature with its Creator and Lord.
In other words, simply put, as Trevor would say in Benoni language or in Johannesburg language, the director is to stay out of [00:18:00] the way, to fall off the perch, not to, in one way or another, be seen, to influence in one direction or another.
And this means, I think, that we have to be very considered when we are sitting with someone with the words that we use. We need to be aware. We need to be ourselves very aware of the way that we phrase things and the words that we use so that the person doesn’t get the impression that we are trying to influence them in one way or another.
And then number 16—
For this purpose, namely, that the Creator and Lord may with great certainty be the one working in his creature. If by any chance the exercitant feels an affection or inclination to something in a disordered way, it is profitable for that person to strive with all possible effort to come over to the opposite of that to which he or she is wrongly [00:19:00] attached.
Thus, if someone is inclined to pursue and hold on to an office or a benefice, not for the honor and glory of God, our Lord, or for the spiritual welfare of souls, but rather for one’s own temporal advantages and interests, one should try to bring oneself to desire the opposite. One should make earnest prayers and other spiritual exercises and ask God, our Lord, for the contrary; that is, to have no desire for this office or benefits or anything else, unless his divine majesty has put proper order into those desires and as by this means so changed one’s earlier attachment that one’s motive in desiring or holding on to one thing rather than another will now be only the service, honor and glory of the Divine Majesty.
What Ignatius is saying there is when the person has a disordered attachment, he or she should pray for its opposite so as to come to a [00:20:00] place of freedom or balance. Once again, see the connection here with the Principle and Foundation. It’s good to notice the importance of the Principle and Foundation and the freedom that it talks about.
Come back to it if you need to, and hence the beginning of the exercises as well. I would say very important to do the Principle and Foundation well, because when we get to the election, if we’ve done the Principle and Foundation well, It’s going to help us to get into this time in the exercises of the election.
So, Ignatius advises there that a person who is struggling with a particular inordinate attachment be encouraged to pray to desire its opposite. Or if you want to use the Latin term to go against it, agere contra, as a way of coming to greater spiritual freedom. So, it’s important that the company or the director is aware of these things right at the [00:21:00] beginning of the process and it’s good to go back as well and to read these annotations at the beginning to remind ourselves.
So, there’s a few things that we should be giving special attention to when we accompany someone as we move into this election time. So, first of all, is this about an election or is it about a reform of life?
We heard those terms last week. We’re going to look a little bit more at them today as well. But is this person making an election a life choice, or is it a reform of life? We may find that many people who are making the exercises these days, especially older people, are not going to be making an election—do I get married or not, or whatever the case is, but rather It’s going to be a reform of life.
How is it that what I found in the exercises or what the Lord has shown me in the exercises is going to be concretized in my life [00:22:00] going forward? How is it that I’m going to live this in a specific way?
The second thing is, is the decision between two good options. If a person comes and says, you know, I’m going to make a decision about whether I should pay for—I’m using a very trivial example, about whether I should pay for something in the shop or whether I should steal it.
Well, there’s no choice to be made there, because when we’re talking about discernment, we’re talking about two goods, but which one is going to be the greater good? We’ve spoken about that before. So, is the decision between two good options? Is the person in spiritual consolation? Is the person in a place of consolation? Do they have sufficient freedom or indifference? And if we maybe start to notice that they don’t, we try to help them by repetition of the two standards, or of [00:23:00] the three classes, or even take them back, as I’ve said already, to the Principle and Foundation. So, we’re paying attention to that. Is there freedom or indifference?
Now, none of us is going to be kind of completely, totally free. We love to believe that we are completely, totally free. Well, that’s not the case. It’s just part of our human life, but is there enough freedom and indifference here for the person to enter into making an election?
And if there are any inordinate attachments getting in the way, for example, things that may lead to greater security or power or maybe a certain relationship, we can also try to get the retreatant to pray to be freed from them. So, we also pray. We, once again, it’s that adgera contra. If we notice that, you know, there might be some sense that I’m leaning towards something [00:24:00] or I’m going in some place because it’s going to give me more power or more security, we may want to get the person to pray against that to work adgera contra.
So, let’s have a little bit about the process. The person may have said something early on in the exercises about the possibility of a significant decision. They may have said this right at the beginning, and that was in a sense put on the back burner as we moved through week one and we moved into a week two.
In the second week, you more specifically bring up the idea of an election or a form of life before the two standards meditation. And even if something hasn’t surfaced explicitly, it’s a good time before that two standards meditation, without imposing anything on the person, to just become conscious of the question, is there a [00:25:00] decision that needs to be made arising from how God has been working with you in the process of the exercises?
How, for example, will you live your life going forward in the future? Get the retreatant to ponder that question. Once they’re reflecting on the three kinds of humility and praying the public life of Jesus, the work of the election slowly starts to take place alongside that. You give the person some scripture text on the public life and possibly a repetition of the three kinds of humility. Give them something specifically focused on helping them engage with the election or the reform of life over the course of a number of weeks as they move into this time of election. This can be done in many different ways, and it partly depends as well on [00:26:00] the mode in which the election is going to take place.
So, it’s important as well that we try to, as a first step, help the person to become aware of the decision and then get clarity on what it is that they need to decide. As I said, early on in the exercises, someone may articulate an important decision that needs to be made, and sometimes that only emerges during the process.
But often, the precise decision still needs to be sharpened or clarified, and this may be part of the conversation that needs to happen, and what needs to be prayed with, prayed over for a while as one moves into this time of election.
So, the first step, making a decision is coming to a consciousness, an awareness that there is a decision to be [00:27:00] made. Maybe it is a life decision, or maybe it is a reform of life. Then we need to spend time in a couple of sessions maybe walking or exploring the question and clarifying that question. What is it? Let’s look for clarity. Well, we need to make a decision, but what exactly is the decision that needs to be made?
So, for example, is God calling me to ordained ministry in my church? Am I called to marry this person that I’m in love with? Am I called to become a doctor or a human rights lawyer or whatever the case is? When it is not an election, the retreat may be something like, do I feel invited to rethink my approach to certain things in my life? And those too will start to come out of the content and the way that God has been working with the person. So, for example [00:28:00] you know, maybe I need to rethink the way I use my money, or my time, or my resources, or maybe I need to, you know, make a decision about how I’m living, an important relationship in my life.
So, we really want to try and crystallize, focus the question, so we know what decision is being made in the exercise. What are we electing? I know last week we spoke about the word election and the connotations that that has so maybe instead of using that, we can say, what is the decision? What is the choice that I have to make here? How would I be able to frame it clearly in a statement or in a question?
Then the next part is gathering information. That’s part of the [00:29:00] work of making a decision. It will involve some data collection. It’s an important part of the process, and it’s much easier to do in the retreating daily life in the 19th annotation format.
There’s a different dynamic in the 30-day format. Most people that we are dealing with are doing it in the daily life in the 19th annotation mode. Even in the enclosed retreat, the person may need to read and pray over information related to their choice. So, what you want to do is you want to get the person to read and to pray, to reflect on the context and the circumstances of the decision that has to be made, because the election or the decision is about a real-life choice. It’s about a real-life choice. It’s going to be lived in real life, and we have to take into [00:30:00] consideration that there might be constraints. There might be circumstances that I need to be aware of in the choice that I am going to make.
So, for example, if someone is discerning whether they are called to be a lawyer or not, they may want to have a conversation with someone who’s doing that kind of work that they can see themselves or hear themselves—what that person says about that.
Or they may want to find out what the prerequisites are if they’re going to study law. What do I need to have to enter into, for example, a law degree? You will remember, if we go back as well, that even in his own discernment, Ignatius Loyola, when he got to Jerusalem and he was going to go to Jerusalem. He was going to help souls, and he was going to live there you know,–poor life and he’s going to just be with Jesus. Well, that didn’t work out because the context and the [00:31:00] constraints of the situation meant that he could not do that. And hence, he had to then go back to Barcelona. So, in a way, that’s what we want to do, and we collect data. We want to make sure as well that we are taking the context of real life and its constraints into account. So, the person will be doing that as they as they live into or begin to move into this this election time.
We also might want to invite the person to dialogue. It’s important, where appropriate, to encourage dialogue when it is necessary. For example, if a married person is making the exercises in daily life and is considering a change in career which will impact on their family, it may require, for example that they make a permanent move to another city or to another country.
It would be good for that person to speak [00:32:00] to their spouse, to dialogue with their spouse or their family about that. So there again, in the 19th annotation, most especially, and this can also happen in the context of the 30 day, but most especially for the 19th annotation, dialogue. Encourage dialogue where and when it may be necessary for the person to enter into dialogue with somebody else about maybe the choice, the decision that they have to make.
Okay, we also want to make sure that there’s harmony with the grace that’s being sought. So, another thing for the accompanier or the director to pay attention to is to minimize perhaps disturbing external stimuli that, and we want to in this time of election, try to create interior space for this process.
The election is an important part, important moment in the exercises. [00:33:00] And so it’s important, for example, that the person is faithful to their prayer in this time, has got time to do the practical explorations that they may need to do—the reading, the gathering of information, the important conversations that they, that they need to have. So there again, we want to make sure; we want to try and help the person and guide them to create the space that they are able to do this, because this is an important moment in making the exercises.
The next thing is we want to be attentive, and aware of what we’ve called the mode or time your retreatant is in, and Ignatius talks about this. He talks about three times for making a suitable and sound decision for a good election and he does that in the exercises—from [00:34:00] number 175 to 177. I’m going to try and explain these as best I can in the time that I have.
So, an awareness of the mode that the retreatant is in—the three times for making a sound and good election. The first one is Mode One. Let’s call it like that or Ignatius would call it Time One or whatever the case is. If this mode is operating, the person doing the retreat will have been graced with a total sense of conviction and clarity about what God’s will or desire is for him or her.
So, the accompanying of the director senses in the person that they have absolutely no doubt that this is from God. They’re consoled. They are at peace with the decision. This mode can be very undramatic, but most authors agree that it is rare. It’s like, for [00:35:00] example, like the Paul in Damascus experience.
It may or may not come with a dramatic experience in or out of prayer. It may just be the simple sense that there’s this complete sureness that this is what the Lord is asking of me at this time, or this is what the Lord is inviting me to do. So, there’s two things. There’s a twofold certitude that the person cannot doubt that this movement is from God, and they cannot doubt that what is shown is what God’s will for them is at that time.
But remember that a decision in this First Mode is not impulsive. It’s not an unthinking decision, but it’s a surrendering to a clear movement of grace. It’s a peaceful cooperation with God acting on our [00:36:00] will. The exercitant may come to their direction session, articulating a particular experience in or out of prayer that has given them the sense of certitude, or the certitude may simply have just been given to them, and they no longer have a sense that any discernment needs to be made. They are sure that this is what God has elected for them and there’s a sense of peace, of courage, of clarity and so forth.
So, there’s no need to move on. There’s no sense that we have to continue. There’s no need to discern further; they are pretty sure that the discernment has been given to them. And so, you invite them to continue to pray the mysteries of the life of Christ, but you should also ask them to offer the decision to God, asking for the grace and strength to live out the consequences of the decision.
Some Ignatian scholars say they should ask for the confirmation. Others suggest that there’s no [00:37:00] need for confirmation, that the decision has already been confirmed for them. But as I’ve said, this is pretty rare and lots of scholars would say, this is not something that happens all the time. For most of us, this is not the case. Okay, that’s what we call Mode One.
Now, Mode Two you’ll see there; the person is unsure of which option is the one that God desires for them, and they are experiencing alternating spiritual consolation and spiritual desolation. So, you need to know where the rules of discernment kick in, and you also want to help the person to imaginatively keep praying the mysteries of the light of Christ. But the accompanier, the giver of the exercises needs to keep the rules for discernment close, and needs to be conscious of them, especially those that are more appropriate to the second week.[00:38:00]
So, the exercitant is to be encouraged to be attentive to the movements off spiritual consolation and spiritual desolation with reference to the options under consideration, the decision that they are looking at, the choice that they have to make.
Now, in the retreat in daily life, this discerning of inner movements is perhaps more difficult as the movements of the election of the choice may be confused with inner reactions to external events at that time in their life. So, the person has a bad day, or they have perhaps an argument with their spouse or something like that. So, also just to be aware that what’s happening in daily life may also be impacting on the person’s inner movements at that time. And so, in relation to praying each of the options as they contemplate the life of Jesus, [00:39:00] it’s important to help them to sense which option allows them to feel more connected at a deeper level with Jesus and where the deeper sense of peace is.
Remember too that false consolation can also be experienced—the deception of the bad spirit under the guise of the angel of light, and hence the importance for us not to move too quickly, but to move being very aware and being very deliberate, just noticing what’s happening.
Ignatius in his directory says, “if among the three modes of making an election, God does not move one in the First Mode, let them seek persistently to find their vocation in the Second Mode of election.” And he says, “Here is the way to do this. Let them continue with their meditations on Christ the Lord. And while doing [00:40:00] so, observe which of the alternative God moves them where they find in themselves consolation and likewise desolation.”
So, if the person is to continue praying on the mysteries of Christ’s life, which enables them to be open to the Holy Spirit, the accompanying director may invite them to pray a particular mystery from the perspective of having chosen first one of the options before them, and then from the perspective of having chosen the other option that they have before them. The idea here is that God will give consolation and draw a person towards the choice of one of the alternatives in preference to the other. Veltri calls this trying it on for size.
So, they’re praying with the one option and then they’re praying with the other option, and we are noticing the qualitative difference there in the movements [00:41:00] of consolation and desolation.
Remember that spiritual consolation always leads to greater faith, and hope and love. Remember as well, in this time of election, this time of decision making, we’re bringing together a number of the other things that we’ve already started to see in the spiritual exercises.
I’m going to just stop the sharing there for a moment because the discernment of God’s will in that Second Mode has got different steps, and let’s just look at those quickly. The one discerning must have spiritual experiences which are of spiritual consolation and spiritual desolation, and so those experiences are data for reflection. We need to use as well what’s already happened there, what the person’s already had. So, once someone has [00:42:00] had these already and they’ve already begun in the exercises, we can also help, and we can also see what the qualitative difference there is between those different those different movements.
We want to look at things like, is the consolation truly spiritual? Is it rooted in faith, hope, and love? If there is a tendency to see a consolation in one of these options, well, okay, let’s look now—is it rooted in faith, in hope, and in love? If the consolation is truly spiritual, is it prompted by the Holy Spirit or by the bad spirit acting as an angel of light. It’s not always easy or even possible to tell. However, the image of the sense of a drop of water falling onto a sponge, the action of the good spirit versus a drop of water on a stone, the action of the bad spirit can sometimes alert us to a false consolation. [00:43:00] Is what we have been drawn to in accord with scripture: is where the person moving—the choice that they’re moving towards—is it in accord with scripture or maybe with church teaching? Is it in accord with sound reason? These are all the things we want to take into account as we listen. And does the motivation for what we have been moved to spring from love of God? Or is it from our own self love? What is the focus? What is the focus here? Is the focus love of God, God’s will, or might there be something here for me? Is there something in this for me?
So, those are all the things we want to take into account when we are listening, when the person is praying in the Second Mode over these two alternatives—the decision that they that they have to make.
Then Ignatius talks about [00:44:00] what we say Mode Three, the third time as a mode—a time of tranquility. This refers to the absence of interior spiritual movements, which could help us and be a means of discernment. The emphasis here is more perhaps on reason. The person’s not in a state of agitation or depression or distress that might get in the way of calm deliberation. But still, the person here, there’s a decision that needs to be made, but maybe they’re coming at it not from those inner movements per se, but rather from a much more reasonable way of dealing with it.
There’ll still be some feelings going on, but they may not be as strong as the movements that we [00:45:00] see in, Mode Two. They may not be as strong. So, we’re not saying there won’t be anything, but notice they may not be as strong.
For this mode, this third way, Ignatius suggests there’s two ways of making the decision. The first way, and you can read them in the exercises, from 179 to 183, he puts six points down. So, he says, the first point, “I put myself before the issue.” So, Ignatius clarifies here that there must be a decision which is subject to a choice. That’s the [00:46:00] first thing.
Then he says—
I recall the fundamental dispositions required on my side for any choice to be made. Recalling the end for which I’m created, to be indifferent, to be free from any disordered attachment, poised as a pair of scales ready to follow the direction I receive. which is going to be more for the glory and praise of God and the salvation of my soul.
Then he says, the third point—”I pray that in the present choice the spirit should act in my will and in my mind.”
The fourth one—“I take as a criteria the service of God and the good of my soul and I consider reasons for and against each of the alternatives before me.”
Then the fifth one—”I evaluate these reasons.” And the fourth and the fifth points concern kind of the deliberative stages of the process. One [00:47:00] of the tools that we can use to do this is the four-column method which Ignatius talks about as well.
Then the sixth point, “I seek confirmation of the decision. We pray for confirmation to be sure that we are doing God’s will as best as we can and counter the tendency in us towards hastily closing this.” So, I go through this process. I’m not going to say, “Okay, I’ve made a decision, but now I’m going to seek confirmation from the Lord. And that confirmation may be given in consoling peace or an insight, or it may come in the sense that we have received no opposite movement or agitation. So that’s the first way that Ignatius recommends there from 179 to 183 in the exercises.
There’s also a second way that Ignatius [00:48:00] suggests making a sound and a good election in this Mode Three and it has four pointers—from 184 to 187. So, the second way in Mode Three is not a method of obtaining evidence of God’s will, but rather a way of testing a felt inclination that moves us towards a particular choice. The method here is used in response to a situation in which in the course of deliberation or as a result of it, the retreatant has moved to feeling drawn to one of the alternatives but is not sure whether the motive is love of God, or maybe rationalization, or there’s something else that is hidden there.
So, the first thing Ignatius says, the first rule there, number 184—
The love which moves me and makes me choose something has to come from above, from the love of God so that the [00:49:00] one who makes the choice should first sense interiorly, that the love he or she has, greater or less, for the thing that is chosen is solely for the sake of the Creator and Lord.
Then he says—
To look at a person whom I have never seen or known, desiring for such a person full perfection, I should consider what I would tell him or her to do, what election to make for the greater glory of God and the greater perfection of their soul. I should then do the same myself and keep the rule which I lay down for another.
So, what he’s trying to do in this rule is he’s trying to help the person to step back and see the situation with greater objectivity without any personal bias or attachments that might confuse the situation. Ivens points out that one can see this working in scripture in the interaction between David and the prophet Nathan in in the [00:50:00] second book of Samuel chapter 12— that we are stepping back—what is the advice maybe that you would give to somebody else? Try and be a little bit more objective.
The third thing he offers is—
If I were at the point of death, to consider what procedure and what norms I would then wish to have followed in making the present election or decision. I should make my decision taking entirely these into account.
And the fourth one is to—
look at and consider my situation on the Day of Judgment and to think how at that moment I would have wanted to have chosen in the present matter. I should adopt now the rule which I then would have wanted to observe so that I may be in total happiness and joy.
So, the third and the fourth rule are helping the person to see things from the bigger perspective, from a bigger picture, from the broader context more inclusively. They’re trying to [00:51:00] help us to step back and to see things as if I was looking down towards him or advising somebody else or looking from a point in the future as if I was looking back—what is the kind of decision that I would want to have made?
And then, curiously, Ignatius has there as well, or maybe not so curiously, he has a little note, which you’ll notice there in number 188—
After I have observed the rules presented above for my salvation and eternal commitment, I shall make my election and offer it to God, our Lord, in the manner described in point six [183] of the First Method of Making an Election.
And I’ve put it there.
When the election or decision has been made, the person who made it ought with great diligence to go to prayer before God, our Lord, to offer him that election and to beg his Divine Majesty to receive and confirm it, provided it is conducive to his greatest service and praise. [183]
So, Ignatius is [00:52:00] saying, that we take then this decision to the Lord and we ask the Lord for some confirmation of the decision that has been made.
Now, there are a number of other things—other helps—in addition to Ignatius’s recommendations that we can look at as well, to help a person in coming to a decision.
Listen to our bodies. Our bodies can often teach us wisdom. Write down, journal. If your body could talk, what would it say to you about your discernment or about the decision that you are coming to?
Memory can also be important. Remembering other times God has guided us in significant decisions can often shed light on our current decision. When we remember the way that God has worked with us in the past, It can help us to hope that God will work in and through this decision in a similar way.
[00:53:00] We want to encourage the directee to get in touch with past experiences of inner freedom when they’ve come to decisions.
Now, for some people, intuition is important—the way that God speaks to some people is through their intuition, Through it, we’re able to access information that already maybe exists within that we’re not always aware of, but intuition, what is the person’s intuition as well.
That might be something that can help, but ultimately, the key really in this process of election or making a choice is that of indifference. As long as we are indifferent and seeking to discover God’s will, there are many helpful exercises that can be part of the journey.
So, for example, another thing you may want to look at as an advert is Trevor’s book, Seeking God’s Will. There’s some stuff in [00:54:00] there that could be very helpful; practical prayer exercises, which you may want to use as a resource when accompanying someone in this time of election. Elizabeth Liebert’s book, The Way of Discernment, may also be another possibility that gives you resources.
Let’s just talk a little bit about the confirmation. I know that time is getting tighter and tighter. When we feel we have come to a sense of what we believe we are being invited to, it’s important to present the decision to the Lord, Ignatius tells us, for confirmation.
Having made the decision, is there a sense of spiritual consolation, a sense of peace at a deeper level, experienced by the directee? As they continue to pray after they’ve made the decision, What is coming up there? Is there spiritual consolation? Often accompanying Jesus through his passion, in which one experiences the cost of discipleship, gives a very powerful context for the confirmation.
Does this [00:55:00] decision, even if it involves difficulty or sacrifice, does it help the person to stay close to the Lord, to be with the Lord. In the retreating daily life, confirmation may also be received through the fruits as one begins to make tentative steps in beginning to put the first steps of the decision into action.
So, confirmation is not a guarantee of the outcome of a decision. It is not so much a confirming of the decision, but rather of the person who has just made that decision.
Veltri, once again, helps us here. He gives us a couple of markers for confirmation. Is this a Jesus centered and not a me centered decision? Is there a realistic awareness of the cost or even of the suffering that may be involved in this decision? Is there a sense of peace underneath what is going on? There may be apprehension; that’s okay, at the consequences of the [00:56:00] implementation, but is there generally a deep sense of peace? Is there quiet growing trust as this person lives into this as they’ve made this decision? And, ultimately, is it about humility and dependence on God?
So, we want to listen for the confirmation in the gospel contemplations. How is the person relating to Jesus? Is Jesus close? Does there seem to be a sense of harmony between the prayer and daily living? Are there positive shifts happening in daily life as the decision emerges? We want to look for the fruits of the person’s decision in the person’s heart. Is there peace? The actions—patience, self-control, faithfulness, all those gifts of the spirit. We’re looking for those fruits.
Confirmation is when a person says something like, “My God, I’ve come to this growing or emerging decision; it seems right to me, I offer it to you [00:57:00] now for your confirmation.”
The person is explicitly and insistently also asking for the grace of confirmation. If the person is not so keen to pray for confirmation, well, we need to ask what is going on there, and other confirmation is revealed in that union that the person may have when they are praying with Jesus, suffering or rejected. When there’s a real sense of wanting to be there, wanting to stay with the suffering Lord, that may also be some confirmation coming through there. This person wanting to stay close with the suffering Jesus.
Okay. Very quickly, just a couple of helpful tools. So, we have what we call a criteria for discernment of an apostolate in the society of Jesus. And these may also be helpful just looking at the persons where they are [00:58:00] moving from as well. Always, is it about the greater service of God? God is the first and foremost in our consideration and how best we can serve God by what we do, what we choose.
Once again, going back to the Principle and Foundation, it reminds us that we are created to praise, reverence, and serve God, our Lord. Is this decision for the greater glory of God?
The second one—the deeper spiritual consolation, which of these options seems to give the person the deepest sense of peace and interior joy. We’re looking for that deepest spiritual consolation. The greater service of others, fruitfulness. Will whatever I decide, will it have an impact on others? Will it help me to serve others? Will others benefit from the decision which I’ve made?
If the decision is one that is about worldly success and status and [00:59:00] money and power, you can see immediately that this is not going to bear fruit in the greatest sense for the service of others—the more universal good. It’s not just about numbers, but the betterment of society and the building of the world community.
What is the greater good? Not just the good, but the greater good. The greater importance of a future good. Often, we human beings look at short term goals, and we leave tomorrow to take care of itself. Well, when making good important decisions, Ignatius recommends we take full account of the future and invites us to attempt to evaluate the future impact of the decision.
More pressing need—when we look at the decision, will the positive effects be focused on the more pressing needs and more urgent needs of others or perhaps on a more peripheral area of [01:00:00] life? To respond to the more pressing need is to aim to have a greater impact, greater influence, the multiplier effect.
One of the things that Ignatius was very strong on was when we make decisions—the issue of influence. He sends Jesuits to work with change makers all over the world. So, the sense of will it bear fruit in other ways? Will it have a multiplier effect?
And of course, a decision that is simple. What will my decision do? How will it impact on the poor and the marginalized? Will it primarily be for the benefit of the rich and the fortunate? Or will it be for the disadvantage? Will it help me to become more Christ like? Would it lead to greater simplicity of life and greater freedom. So those are just helpful tools.
You’re not always going to find all of those, but those are just helpful tools that could also point us towards practically [01:01:00] looking at the decision that is made.
Then there’s that four-column method. Just quickly to look there on the screen is Ignatius’ four column method. So, you divide that page there. I will do X, the advantages and the disadvantages.
I will do X. I will not do X. The advantages and the disadvantages, and I’ve given you an example there. That four-column method that can be used in that mode too. So, for example, I love someone. My decision is, should I get married, or should I not get married? Advantage, well, yeah, I love this person. The disadvantage, well, I fear commitment. On the other hand, I will not get married. The advantage is, I’ll be more independent. The disadvantage, I will be alone. So, you get the person simply just to use these columns and to write down and to fill as many as they can of these advantages [01:02:00] and disadvantages.
So, note that it’s not advantages or disadvantages, but four columns. The advantages and disadvantages of accepting and the advantages and disadvantages of not accepting, and this can sometimes be a tool as well that we can use to help someone when they are in this process of making a decision.
Okay, concluding I think number 169 is very helpful. The “I” of our intention ought to be a single. I ought to focus only on the purpose for which I was created to praise our Lord and to save my soul. So once again, I think that’s important as we enter into this election process or this decision making or choice in the exercises. I think it’s also important to see the election as a unifying process.
The first week of the exercises [01:03:00] we talk about it being purgative. The second week, that illuminative, getting to know Jesus at a deeper level. And hopefully, this leads towards a unity, which we see in the third and the fourth weeks. But the election as well is a unifying process that hopefully, as I’ve been through week one, and as I enter into this deeper relationship with the Lord, the choice I’m making is going to draw me into a closer union—a unity with the Lord.
I just put there two thoughts. The vision becomes the treasure. The vision that we see in the beginning of week two of the exercises is the election or the choice of making that vision a reality. I’m listening to my call and I’m becoming who I really am. What I’m choosing is helping me to become who I [01:04:00] really am.
And once before, I’ve also used this image, and I close with this clarity about what I’m offering. What am I to give? What is the bread? The choice I’m making, the decision I’m making is the bread that I am going to offer. It’s going to hopefully feed others. It’s not going to feed me. It’s going to feed others. And so, my election as well is like preparing bread. The choice I’m making is hopefully not only going to bring me into alignment with what God’s desire is for me, but from that, hopefully it’s going to help me to be life giving to others.
Annemarie: Thank you so much for that, Russell. So, I think let’s come back at 20 past the hour; just give you a few minutes to think. Pam’s put the questions up in the chat and so, we’ll see you shortly.[01:05:00] [01:06:00]
Russell: Welcome back, everybody. As we say, the screen is open for insights, thoughts, [01:07:00] questions. Shirley.
Shirley: I have a question actually that started last week, and I’ve been thinking about it all week and then brought it up to our small group. And that is, it appears to me in our small group, everyone had really done the exercises as more of a reform of life, rather than as an election, and it appears to me in our day and age that the ones the [01:08:00] exercises are attracting are all older people who are doing it more as a reform of life.
My question is—Is this appropriate to take a 19- to 25-year-old through and if so, how do we give it valid space, or how do we engage with those who are younger in our world? The benefits of this seem huge just in the election itself, but the people that I’m going to take through or am taking through will go through more as a reform of life, and my heart’s cry is for those that are younger who have their whole life to live. How do we engage them? And do we engage them? Maybe it’s not appropriate for them.
Annemarie: Fascinating and excellent question, Shirley. Thank you. Annemarie and I were just having a discussion about this [01:09:00] very thing at three o’clock this afternoon or whenever it was. So, I think generally, we do find that people who are doing the 19th annotation tend to be older people and most of those people would be making the exercises for the reform of life.
Now, interestingly, I don’t think Ignatius in his mind had the idea of older people doing it. Ignatius saw this as something that people did kind of early on in life that would give them direction or make a choice for the rest of vocational calling for the rest of their lives.
In actual fact, in the Constitutions of the Society of Jesus, Ignatius says that we shouldn’t even accept someone who’s over the age of [01:10:00] 50. If they are going to be ordained, 50 or over the age of 50, we shouldn’t accept them that by then people should have made a life decision and there’s other things involved in that as well. So, he certainly had it in his mind that younger people would be making this.
However, I think, and the others will also chip in on this, I’m sure. I think that the world that Ignatius inhabited was a very different world to the world we have now. We live in a much more complex world than what, in many senses, than what Ignatius did. We live in a world that has a plethora more of choice than what maybe the world that Ignatius lived in and the culture that he came from and so forth. So, I think we have to use the wisdom of it, but we have to see as well that it’s not necessarily cast in stone and the spirit is clearly moving people later on in life to make the spiritual exercises.[01:11:00]
Now, the question of giving them to young people; there’s very split opinion about this. For example, we Jesuits, when someone enters the Society of Jesus, within the first year of our formation, they will do the spiritual exercises, and normally they would do that with an election, a life choice, a vocational choice, or it will be a confirmation of the fact that they’ve entered and we have sometimes people who are entering at the age of 19-23, especially here in the African context. There is a raging debate about that, that goes on even amongst Jesuits. In some parts of the world, Jesuits are entering at later, so we’re finding peoples in their late 20s, in their early 30s that are entering.
My take on it is I think, if all the other things that we’ve spoken about in terms of entering into or doing the exercises are in [01:12:00] place, that the person has a regular prayer life, that there’s a desire and so forth. I’m not sure. I mean, if you look at someone like Annemarie, who did the exercises almost when she popped out her mother’s womb; she was 17 or 18 or whatever it is. I’m not sure that it’s helpful to have a universal blanket on things, but once again, we need to take every single individual and where they are into account. I think if a young person comes and says they want to do the exercises, I don’t see any difficulty with starting the journey.
Now, they may not even get to the place where they’re going to make an election, or they may make that first set of the spiritual exercises, kind of more in the reform of life type of mode, which might later on crystallize in a decision as to what they’re going to do. So, I think that if there’s a lot of things that are already there that point in the [01:13:00] direction of desire, prayer, it seems to me that the exercise can be done for anybody.
But I think it needs to be done with caution, and we need to know what we are doing. We need to have a lot of things in mind as we journey with a young person doing these exercises. I don’t know if that’s a helpful answer. Annemarie, Trevor, If you want to pitch.
You see, the problem is I come from a Jesuit world where we are having young people do this, and we’re seeing lots of young people do this as well, and in some cases, you know, it doesn’t work, or people decide to leave. Other cases, it does work. I’m not saying that leaving is a bad thing, because if it’s not for them, then the exercises have worked. But I think there’s varying degrees of depth, depending on the person and where they come from. Annemarie, you wanted to say something.
Annemarie: I always remember that when [01:14:00] I wanted to make the exercises, I went to the Jesuit who was the chaplain at the university where I was studying. and I said, I’ve heard about these exercises and I’m wondering if I can make them. And he said to me, “Well, you’re very young, come back when you’re a little older,” and three months later, I went back and I said, “I’m older now. Can I please make the exercises?” So eventually after I really pushed, he said, “Okay, let’s try.” And I think there’s something there about desire. Does the person really, really, really want to do this? I think that’s a key thing and that’s a thing to be looking at.
I think the other thing is opportunity that I was lucky to have heard about the exercises. I think a lot of people don’t know that there’s that opportunity out there, and I think that your point Shirley is really important. How do we make this opportunity available so that those who really would like it and who might benefit know that it’s an option?
I think it’s about [01:15:00] finding ways, whether it’s chaplaincies, prayer groups at university level or wherever it might be looking for a way in to where young people are and then maybe offering some things that give a taste of what Ignatian spirituality is about and that potentially leading to conversations with maybe a small percentage of those people who might really be in a place where the exercises might be exactly what they’re looking for. So, this is my thought.
Russell: Brenda, you wanted to say something as well.
Brenda: I was just wondering, Russell and Annemarie and thinking about it, I think one of the challenges with the 19th annotation for young people is the stability of keeping up a prayer practice for that extended amount of time. As I’ve accompanied people and as I’ve supervised people. that’s been a challenge in the 19th annotation. Whereas I think in a 30 day, that might be easier for a younger [01:16:00] person without family commitments and those kind of things. So, I’m wondering if just the format within which the exercises are made might also have an impact when we’re looking at people’s age.
Russell: Yeah, I can see both sides of doing that as well, because in a way with a younger person, the 19th annotation gives one a longer time to be able to get to some depth, whereas the 30 day can go by quite quickly, but I think that thing of desire, and I think that thing of considering the individual is very important. I know, for example, in the U. S. many of our Jesuit high schools already start kind of giving people some sort of formation right from the beginning of high school so that they are sort of learning something. [01:17:00] What could one say? You know, little drops of water along the way and some of those
So, it’s really finding those places where one can begin to offer a little pearls and hopefully eventually, I think do. We live in such a fluid world as well. I think we have to take that into account, so when someone does come and say they’re ready to make this long commitment, and there’s real desire, and if they come and pester you after three months and think they’re that much older, like some people in our presence, you know, we’ve got to listen to that desire, you know, I think we really have to listen to that desire.
Shirley: May I ask a further question then?
Russell: Sure.
Shirley: Mostly of Brenda. What creates the stability of keeping a prayer practice for younger people as difficult versus older people as difficult? What are you looking for [01:18:00] there?
Brenda: I’m just thinking experience wise. So younger people who we’ve accompanied, life is much more fluid. They are studying. They are starting careers. They are moving around and so that has created challenges in terms of just keeping the flow of daily prayer and weekly meetings is harder, whereas older people tend to be more settled in in their life.
So, I’m just really thinking practicalities of actually doing this thing—the regular prayer, the regular meeting. I think the desire is there and we’ve obviously thought it was worthwhile beginning, but it’s just been challenging because young people are moving around in many ways more than older people.
Shirley: Thank you all.
Trevor: Maybe I could add something [01:19:00] there to what Brenda has said. I’ve had the privilege the last few years of taking mainly folk through who are in their thirties and I’ve learned, like Brenda has just said that they’re more fluid, they’re moving around, they’re more challenges, etc. and I have found it quite helpful when doing it to, within that first week, to work out whether we’re going to do the full spiritual exercises or whether this is just going to be a first week. And I think that one is able to make that discernment by how they have responded to keeping in their prayer practice for the dispositional days and for the first week. I think one gets a very good idea of whether they are in for this for the long haul or [01:20:00] whether perhaps it needs to just be the first week.
Russell: Thanks, Trevor. Josie.
Josie: I had the experience of a young woman that I was meeting with, and we were not doing the exercises, but she was really in a very big decision career wise, and she decided to go do the eight day. I was just curious about that as another sort of tool. It wasn’t the full exercises, but she did an eight-day retreat and just the role of that. What’s your thought on that, Russell?
Russell: So sometimes people talk about the eight-day retreat as if it’s a replica of the spiritual exercises, because they try and use the same dynamic. I’m not sure that [01:21:00] works. I’m not sure that one can do that—the first two days of the first week I know some people offer it like that. Yeah, I would have big questions about that. However, I also think that when someone has to make a big decision, and they enter into a time of retreat like that, they’re pretty focused on what they need to do. So, I’d caution against us thinking that maybe someone who did the exercise is going to make a better decision than someone that just does an eight-day retreat. God works in so many different ways, and God can often work in ways that are even beyond our ability to understand things.
It strikes me that someone who enters into a space like that is quite serious about the decision that they’re going to make. There might be some elements or quite a few elements of what we are talking about this [01:22:00] process involved in the decision that they’re going to make and the decision that they make coming out of that eight-day retreat might be one which is really good and might be a life changing experience or whatever the case is and that’s great. I would just be careful not to marry the two and think that we’re doing the same thing because we’re not doing exactly the same thing, and I think there’s value in both.
Annemarie: I think I would agree with what you’ve said there, Russell. I mean, interestingly I made the main election in my life in the form of an eight-day retreat post making the exercises. So sometimes the exercises made the first time might be a reform of life or might lay the groundwork and it might be that a decision crystallizes in an eight-day retreat down the line. I think anytime we take real space and time with God around something significant like a decision, it’s really helpful. But sometimes eight [01:23:00] days is just not enough if it’s a huge decision and you need some kind of follow up because the person may get into the material but not quite get to the point of being able to make the decision that they’re trying to make. It may not clarify within that period.
Russell: Monica.
Monica: We were talking about in our group, the criteria for discernment and specifically about that question. I think it’s always challenging for me the—the bigger question of what is to the greater service of God and discovering what that more is. You had laid out some helpful tools and we talked, like—is it universal good? Is it future good? Is it a pressing need? And just thinking about some situations, maybe the greater good is just working with one [01:24:00] particular person, like one disabled person, rather than being a pastor of a thousand people. So, you wouldn’t use that criteria, but I just think it’s always challenging to ask, how can we determine the greater good or the more? It just seems like impossible questions. What criteria do we put first, I guess. In our group, we couldn’t even know what the universal good is—the kingdom is so upside down so just wondering your thoughts on that.
Russell: That’s a very good question—the question of the greater good. The first thing I want to say—and you already pointed towards that—is the greater good may not be necessarily 1000 people or universal or whatever the case is. I have [01:25:00] two things, just saying—I have to make a decision between doing this and doing that. In those two things that I am deciding, what might be the greater good? Now, there may be other tools there as well that necessarily point to another good that might be at that moment in that situation more important.
So, I also want to say those things are all just tools that are helpful for us, but you’re never going to be able to go down the list and tick every one of them. So, the greater good in the sense of, where can I offer the most? In whatever choice I make, what might be stretching me to offer the most in that particular situation.
Your example of maybe helping one person, [01:26:00] there might be a greater good there. If you’re looking after someone who for one reason or another can’t live life as the rest of us live, so I say, my vocation might be to take care of this person or that person—whatever the case is. There may have been a whole lot of other people whose lives were impacted on, and therefore, by me taking care of that one person, the greater good is all those other people that may have been tied up with us are free to do other things that they perhaps they need to do. So, we must be very careful that we don’t perceive that just simply as a number thing, but what might be in this space, you know—the greater good for me to choose.
I also think there’s something in this about when we’re in this process of making the choice—in the process of election, we have to also trust that the Lord is going to show us what [01:27:00] the greater good is. We mustn’t get too caught up about, I’m feeling this is the right thing, but is it the greater good? No, there’s a whole lot of other things that need to come together there as well to help us to confirm or to make the decision that we’re going to do.
It’s Ignatius way as well of being kind of radical, huh? He wants us to think radically. He wants us to be stretched, to think further than just simply maybe what I see here. He wants us to be stretched as well because I personally think, for example, the Principle and Foundation, that second part—that kind of freedom that he’s asking for—I often look at that and wonder to myself, who of us is really that free, you know? I mean, he’s really pushing us to be radical there, and I think the same with this question of the universal good. He’s really pushing us to be radical there, but we also have to be real. I don’t know. Does that help? [01:28:00] Annemarie? Trevor?
Annemarie: It’s not just what is going to be good for me or what is going to be good in the narrow context of me and God in our relationship, but what is going to be good in terms of looking at the world. This is apostalic dimension and those criteria that Russell gave us were specifically in the constitutions around ministry—around service. How do we choose between two different pieces of ministry or work?
And in a way, they’re just kind of questions getting us to think about how many people might this impact? What kind of need might there be down the line? If you think about something to do with climate change. that might be really, really important and in 20 years’ time, it may have been the more important option, and we can’t know any of those things or we can’t know for sure. I think you’re absolutely right, [01:29:00] but I think at least it gives us tools to think these things through a little bit and to ask the questions of ourselves and to think around it a little bit more in terms of a bigger picture and how other people are impacted.
Russell: I can give you a very practical example. I don’t know if this is helpful, but in terms of choosing a ministry. We had to choose between taking on two different parish communities—the Jesuits I’m talking about. The one was a really good community, well resourced; it was running well. There were people there who were influential; you would have resources there to do all sorts of things that you wanted to do.
The other one was a parish In basically a shanty town where there was no structure and there were all sorts of difficulties. Now, we have to make a decision. What is going to be the universal good here? And we decided in the end that we should take that place that was in the shanty town [01:30:00] with all those difficulties, that there would be a greater good there by putting in structures and helping that place to grow and become really a community within this sprawling mess of informal settlements and no sanitation, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. That would be the better place for us to go because that would be a universal good. We could have a real impact on people’s lives there, whereas the other place, whether we went there or not, it would continue to run pretty well, even though they had resources.
Does that kind of help as well? It was a tough decision because this place with the resources could have actually helped that place as well, so that that was sort of the criteria that we used.
Annemarie: Russell, I think that Gavin’s wanting to say something.
Russell: Oh, there we go. And [01:31:00] now you’ve popped up. Sorry,
Gavin: Having had some privileged exposure to some of your wonderful colleagues, I’ve been very struck by the differences in their calling.
For example, help souls. Some are really, really digging that well deeply. Help souls. Whereas others are multiplier effect, multiplier effect, multiplier effect. And Vivianne, in our group just mentioned that whatever your kind of vocation calling is, and that in itself becomes the well out of which the universal good under God becomes “fruitful” not always according to our understanding of fruitfulness, but also in terms of like that [01:32:00] tremendous decision you guys had to make between those two parishes and I think often it only becomes apparent in time. So, I just throw that out for perhaps further wandering discussion.
Russell: Yeah, that sense as well of people’s gift, and maybe I didn’t stress that enough as well. When we’re doing that kind of gathering of data, if I’m a really bad public speaker, and I find it very hard to stand up and speak in front of other people, and it causes all sorts of anxiety and I’m considering being a litigation lawyer versus a writer, there’s so much playing into this as well, and hence the question of time and [01:33:00] looking for the giftedness. What are my strengths? We want to explore this as widely as possible which I think is important.
For example, sticking me in an administrative job to do accounts, I can tell you will be a very bad thing to do. I find accounts boring, but I have a colleague who thinks sitting in front of a spreadsheet is marvelous. I mean, this gives them life. They smile when they look into the spreadsheet. I couldn’t do that, you know?
So, if I was making a decision about becoming an accountant or becoming a journalist or whatever, I think this is where I should go. Giftedness is another thing, or a person’s strengths that we have to take into account as well when we’re moving towards this decision. Thank you for that. Gavin. [01:34:00] Elizabeth.
Elizabeth: Yes, thanks, Russell. We’ve been focusing on this it seems to me, from a clean slate point of view, and I’m just wondering, especially with older retreatants who have chosen vocations, whether in your experience you’ve dealt with grief that might come up with people who would have loved to have had what Annemarie had at 17 or 18 and didn’t, and have made decisions that have been painful. I just wondered if there’s another perspective on this.
Russell: Yeah, and I think that’s a very important and a very powerful question, and I’m going to kick some of it over to Annemarie because she’s done a lot in the area of grief.
But you know, right at the beginning I said that the role of the person accompanying is [01:35:00] to gently guide the process and I think implicit in that as well is that we have to be taking these things into account. When someone is older, and they’ve had a life experience and maybe even they’ve made a decision. For example, someone made a decision, and they believed that this was what God was asking me to do—I’m going to get married to a person and this is God’s will and there’s a sense of confirmation and peace about it and the relationship falls apart.
When they come later on into the exercises—and they’re going to do that—I think one has to be very sensitive to those kinds of situations and one has to listen very carefully because in a way it’s almost like there’s a healing that has to take place as well. in terms of my confidence in making decisions, that I believe that God is with me [01:36:00] in that decision or in that choice or whatever the case is.
So, the stage of life that someone’s in, I would say, is very important. And right away, when we take someone on to do the exercises, I think that’s one of the things we have to be aware of; that in different stages of life and the experiences of life, this is going to play into this whole question of choosing and choice as well.
In terms of the specific question you asked about grief stuff, Annemarie would be better to talk about that than me
Annemarie: It’s interesting because Diana raised this last week as well—that this thing of grief is so important and so strong that we have to notice what’s happening. I think that often, those kinds of things are going to come up earlier in the process—not always, but even in the disposition days, the [01:37:00] Principle and Foundation, the first week—if there is something really significant in terms of a decision that has been made that has been a place of grief, my hope is that a lot of the healing might really begin to happen in that preparatory phase as we are leading into the first week.
And even in the first week itself, if there’s a sense of responsibility around it, not only grief, but also a feeling of maybe I didn’t make the decision that I would have wanted to make, that that may also be part of it. I think you want to go really slowly and really gently, leaving space for lots of journaling and for lots of reflection. There might be a space for needing to really find ways of expressing to God the pain and the struggle and the loss; the kind of lament part of it that might well come up in the first week.
[01:38:00] So yeah, in the time we have, it’s probably, what I would say but maybe it’s something we need to focus on a little bit more because I’m just conscious that it’s something that’s coming up quite a bit and it’s not something we’ve given a lot of space to.
Russell: And I think, Annemarie, the fact that a lot of people that are coming to do the Nineteenth Annotation tend to be older people, we’re going to see much more of maybe people having to deal with some of the things of the past. And maybe even what Ignatius envisions at the beginning when younger people were doing this. I think it is something we need to give more thought to and maybe consider giving a bit more time to.
Trevor: Would Veltri’s understanding of the exercises being made in a healing mode—could that be helpful? Just his understanding of the exercises happening, not so much within a calling mode as it were, [01:39:00] but within a healing mode.
Annemarie: I think it could be, and maybe we could send a little bit from that for those who don’t have Veltri—just to have a look at.
We’ve often seen it in terms of healing around image of God and that kind of thing, but I think there’s a much broader thing here, and maybe this applies to the grief space as well.
Russell: I think there’s something else just to throw in here and maybe we need to explore this a little bit more as well. I was talking to someone the other day who’s a tuition director for Jesuits. We do the spiritual exercises the first time where normally there’s kind of an election or confirmation of a decision. And later on, after a number of years of ministry, we go back and do them again and he said to me that in that second experience, like the election is not really the core of what’s happening in there because [01:40:00] the person’s already made the choice. It may be a reform of life, but he said to me, it’s not always a reform of life either, that there’s kind of a mode of making the exercises that is a deepening that where the emphasis is not just on that election and so, I think also I’m going to explore that a bit more with him because I think that could be helpful as well and offer us some insights into when one is. giving them or accompanying, someone in that mode, what it may look like and what happens in that space.
Annemarie: Thank you so much, Russell. I’m going to hand over to Adri-Marie to just lead us in a time of closing. Thanks, Adri-Marie.
Adri-Marie: You would have heard us say a few times perhaps that sometimes things will come up that personally stirs you. That might be a good thing to talk to your own spiritual [01:41:00] director especially when it comes to beautiful things like discernment, call, election.
So, I’m going to invite you, for a moment, just give a big exhale and if you’d like, maybe there’s a note that you would like to make for yourself. Maybe there’s something that came up tonight for you in your own life that you would like to explore further in prayer or with your spiritual director. In a form of gentle landing, just with the Holy Spirit, make a note if there’s something that stirred you.[01:42:00]
And then from Herbert Alfonso’s book, Discovering Your Personal Vocation, in the Foreword, they use this phrase, and I’m just gonna read it for you.
The true purpose of The Exercises is to help us remember our real name.
Lord, just the thought of being called by name, loved [01:43:00] into being, from love, for love, we ask that you help us hear as you call us with our real name. Amen.
Annemarie: Amen. See you all next week. Have a good week and have a good holiday those of you who are having a day today.